Your Resting Joy Rate

Do you thrive on pressure? Or peace?

As a human being, you get conditioned to wins. And so many of us are on the hedonic treadmill, pursuing one pleasure after another and discovering that what once brought us immense happiness quickly fades. What seemed like a “win” to me six months ago doesn’t seem like a “win” to me today, which can help create new pressure to keep making things happen. This is only magnified by the impact of social media as we all compare ourselves to others including our assumption that everyone around us has a higher “resting joy rate” hereby take our own down!

I’m acknowledging the fact that I need to embrace more of the peace and less of the pressure. 

We’re wired to be peace-oriented or pressure-oriented, and I’m pressure oriented. I actually don’t enjoy peace at all. There’s nothing worse to me than being alone. I’m an identical twin married to an identical twin: neither of us was alone in the womb. But I was recently traveling in LA with my friend Bert Weiss, and as we were discussing peace over pressure, we decided to become accountability partners. This includes a daily journal, at least three minutes of meditation, reading a book, and weekly yoga. And we text each other to check in for accountability.

This practice of peace is critical as I learn to let go a little bit. Last week, my speaking agent, Keri, said, “Chris, It’s time to put down the shovel. You spent the last three years hustling, and it’s time to relinquish some of that control and just watch things start to blossom.” I do need to put down the shovel. 

Here’s an example of choosing peace over pressure. Today, I had an hour to kill, and instead of calling nine people, I went for a walk. Not a run, not going as fast as I can, but a walk, just listening to music. And a week into my peace accountability project, I look forward to journaling, especially writing my gratitudes. It increases my resting joy rate, something that came up during a walk with my friend Tim Caroll. 

All of us have a resting joy rate, much like we have a resting heart rate. When I first talked to a psychiatrist, he said, “Chris, you were born with this crazy amazing positive outlook. That’s just who you are.” So I give back to the world with my resting joy rate, which happens to be super high.

I met Mayo Sowell while I was waiting in line at a coffee shop. After a little conversation, we quickly realized we were kindred spirits. Mayo has one of the highest resting joy rates of anyone I’ve ever met.

 

We can each acknowledge where our resting joy rate is—there might be a need for peace in the present to get us back to where we need to be. Thanks to the impact of social media, people are comparing their insides to everyone’s outsides, which affects resting joy rates. Each of us can take a serious look at how social media is impacting our lives: spend one day unplugged from the feeds and see how you feel. If you need social media for work, I get it. But if you’re wasting time, and you feel anything other than joy from looking at your smartphone, put it away. 

And the best way to get our resting joy rates back up, I’ve learned, isn’t relishing the wins and putting ourselves under pressure to get the deal. By practicing peace, by practicing gratitude, and by serving others and focusing on them more than ourselves, we’re able to increase our resting joy rates. It’s with a massive foundation of gratitude that we can each increase that resting joy rate. But one thing I KNOW for sure is that I was put on this earth to help everyone around me increase their resting joy rate for sustainable wins. Nothing gives me more energy, joy and flow than when I can help someone articulate a passion or goal and then act as the catalyst for them to pursue it through ideas and connections!

I feel incredibly blessed that so many of you have entrusted me to come into your organizations — thank you! I began this venture with a tool belt full of truths I knew I was called to pass on from my experience leading younger generations, leading teams and building authentic business relationships.  My commitment to you is to continue to learn alongside you. Now, I am adding "Resting Joy Rate" to that tool belt. 

During the past few months, it has been an overwhelming experience to watch teams transform and cultures change, creating a place for humans to grow, prosper and feel their worth. I love watching your light bulbs go on. I love reigniting passions in people who thought they needed to leave their jobs, but actually didn't have to. I love equipping each of you to serve and lead in ways you never dreamt possible. 

It’s amazing. Just when I’m starting to feel pressure over peace, someone reaches out with encouraging video texts or messages. I feel humbled by this community. You have poured out more support than I thought possible for this movement. And you have shown me how hungry you all are to learn, press in, and press on. What I am finding is the more we pursue our passions, the easier it is to walk in rest and joy and just let what will be. The place of striving and pressure I had grown accustomed to came  from an illusion of control that I actually never had. When we embrace our true calling and walk in the gifts entrusted to us we can release our grip and watch the snowball grow. We can put the shovel down and trust. Thank you all for trusting me. Let’s keep passing along what we can to help others continue to thrive and grow and let’s do that from a place of peace versus pressure. When we are at peace, we can do more to change the world!