Why 20 Percent of People Want to Punch Me in the Face

Social media has made everything seem so easy in our lives, whether it’s friends finishing marathons or, I’ll admit, authors like me who are traveling around the country to deliver speeches. 

We don’t incorporate enough of the tough times into our stories. Right now in my life, for every two days that are amazing, when I have all the confidence in the world, I have one day where I feel the exact opposite. And that’s okay. 

I’ve spoken to so many audiences that I tend to get a good feel for them within the first 15 minutes of a speech. I might sense that 50% of the audience wants to punch me in the face because of my yellow glasses, and my tattoos, my energy, and my confidence. My goal is to get that number lower, to be as approachable as possible. Recently I’ve been working with Nick Morgan, a speaking coach, and Christine O’Leary, a comedy coach, to bring in more humanity to my speeches. But there’s still about 20% of the audience that wants to punch me in the face. I can almost hear what they’re thinking: Who is this guy? Is he for real? Is he really this optimistic? Does he actually live authentically?

The answer is yes, and the answer is yes because I went to the darkest corners of my mind when I hit rock bottom in 2016. Rebuilding my life seemed like it was taking forever, even as I hit success with the publication of The Millennial Whisperer. But I realized I just had to keep moving, to keep taking action. One of the biggest issues we run up against as humans is inaction. The worst thing we can do is nothing at all. So my currency had to evolve to be in line with my new passions and purposes which are, right now, helping people identify and unlock their dreams. 

This morning, I was talking to a woman, about 60 years old, who is an executive at a very large company. And it was very evident to me that the only thing holding her back from going in on her dreams and living out the last little bit of her career doing what she loves was herself. What I emphasized to her was that it might look easy when I start talking and getting so excited. But it’s hard. It’s work to take action and push myself through the low days to get to the high ones. 

The unfortunate side about the 20% that want to punch me in the face is that I don't necessarily get to follow up with them three months later. But if you listen to the bonus section of my book “Save Your Asks” you’ll hear directly from Tim Carroll who went from the guy that wanted to swipe the glasses off my face to my greatest advocate and best friend as he implemented the book’s strategies during a year and half. 

Pushing ourselves out of our comfort zones, no matter how small the action, is the biggest thing we can do.

Just do something. The worst thing we can do is nothing at all. 

And if you want to do one thing right now to take action, send a video text message to someone you’re grateful for, but haven’t connected with for months. Watch what happens.